I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
