I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I currently don't understand fingers.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
