When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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