May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
