Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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