Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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