Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
