no. you can't hotbox the world.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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