More tranny stories later!
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
