I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Girls should come with a carfax report
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
