3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
