she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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