i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I looked at my own cervix.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
