i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
