He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
that is very illegal...i love you.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
