I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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