if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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