I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
