i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
