if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
