escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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