It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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