You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
