i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
