lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
