stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
You can't special order awesome
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
