Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
