he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
