Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
