weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize