the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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