there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
There are leaves in my underwear?
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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