is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
