i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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