so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
