It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
