After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
