I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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