I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
