I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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