You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
