I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
