hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Couch. On fire.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
