Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Randomize
