It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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