I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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