Sponge bath it is.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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