this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
As shirtless as possible
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
