you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
