new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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